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Monday, June 30, 2008

Mark Madsen’s 2001 Lakers Parade Speech: An Analytical Breakdown

Yes, this qualifies as the B.N.B. sort-of related to sports video of the day. Yes, it may be a little old. Yes, it is absolutely hilarious. And yes, it’s a little late for a daily video, so what -- wanna fight about it?

Anyway, if you’ve read any of my Real Sporting World articles, you know I have a strange fascination with Mark “The Mad Dog” Madsen. I’m guilty of poking fun at him from time to time but really, I respect the man for being himself. He is 110% always the Mad Dog that is Mark Madsen, even if he does often make people doubt that he’s actually a real living human being. He is folks, he is that and more.

If you’ve never heard of Mark Madsen, he is a professional basketball player best known for his bench cheering skills and the unparalleled intensity he exhibits when tossed into a game. Whether or not these things have anything to do with the fact that he’s averaged 12.0 minutes per game for his career (seriously, become a believer: Here). But although one might first notice that the Mad Dog has averaged 2.2 points per game or 0.4 assists is the intangibles he brings to the table. Not only will Madsen give you his all on the court, but he’ll give you his all on the bench as well.

You also might know him best from his Lakers days, because that is when he was most relevant. I’ve taken it upon myself to remind the world of the legend that is Mark Madsen whenever I can, and I figured why not feature him in the BNB video of the day? But what video to pick, fore there are so, so many! Then it dawned on me. His legendary speech at the 2001 Lakers Championship Parade. Following the speech is an analytical breakdown, because although it’s pretty straight forward, I knew it would be a blast to do. Enjoy.



(Note: I’ve broken the common trend of how many actual seconds each clip is into the video and replaced it with what it says on the You tube player as you play it. There’s no math involved and as we all know, everybody wins when that‘s the case.)

0:01 - The speech extravaganza host begins his introduction. He pretty much gets it spot on. Even though you’ve already probably heard it, I’ll post what is said for our speaker impaired readers (with my comments in italics in between quotes for the rest of the post):

“Out of the University of Stanford or Stanford University if you like..” This announcer is on his game, he’s attempting to please every possible person who could be at this parade. Well done.

“He was an honor student..” Not surprising.

“He is a crowd favorite..” Also not surprising.

“Didn’t play very much but when he played, he played with an intensity that no other Laker prob--ever exceeded.” Whoever this announcer is, I like him. He doesn’t sugar coat anything, he aims to please and he isn’t afraid to make bold statements if it’s true. He goes to say ‘..no other Laker probably’ but immediately corrects himself because he knows there is no other nominees in the intensity category if Mark Madsen is involved. Bravo!

“He’s the guy who went and picked the other guys’ laundry up and brought it to their rooms. He’s the guy who carried their bags from the hotel lobby up to their rooms.” By other guys’ the announcer means Kobe Bryant. After the bag part, he realizes he’s beginning to downplay the Mad Dog and boos are heard. A professional, he quickly realizes this and spouts:

“That’s enough.” I’m beginning to like this announcer even more than I like Mark Madsen if that’s even possible.

“Mark Madsen!” A thunderous applause is heard. A couple boos as well, but they’re drowned out -- probably due to the fact that whoever was booing was promptly beaten. Dumb asses. Okay, they’re not drowned out completely, but still. This is in Los Angeles! There’s probably some renegade Kings, Warriors and Clippers fans littered throughout the crowd. Yeah, that’s it.


0:38 - The Mad Dog is officially at the microphone at this point. He raises his patented number one finger and thanks the crowd, completely oblivious to the booing. Madsen knows these people are either a) jealous he’s not on there team or b) too drunk to remember when he played that year -- so it’s all good.

“Thank you!” The man is the definition of class.

0:40 - Madsen pauses to let the thank you sink in then offers,

“You are the greatest fans in the world!” Okay, I think we can all agree that this is a blatant lie -- but that isn’t stopping Mark from making it appear and sound as if he sincerely believes this. A maniacal Mad Dog grin completes the whole thing. Not only does he give you 110% on the court and bench, but the man gives it all in the P.R. department as well. Lakers fans the greatest in the world? Haha! Good stuff Mark, I nominate you for an Emmy!

0:43 - Still holding up the number one sign, Mark keeps grinning and let’s what he just said sink in. The man’s a genius. Even Lakers fans know they’re not the greatest in the world, but scream it at a pep rally and let it sink in for a few seconds. ‘Hey, we might just be the greatest fans in the world! Sure, half of the people with Laker flags on their cars wouldn’t be able to name who we played in the Finals -- but who cares! We’re the best in the wooooooooorld!’

0:45 - Madsen punctuates this thinking with a roaring,

“YEEEEEEEEEEEEAH!!” P.R. Genius.

0:47 - He pauses again then shouts,

“WHO LET THE DOGS OUT!?!” This has absolutely nothing to do with the Lakers team, unless they played this during the season. Which wouldn’t surprise me, but I doubt it. I think it has to do with his nickname more than anything. Yes, I thought of that myself. Regardless, Madsen proves here that he's topical. The man knows what’s in style and he’s aware of his nickname. What more could you want from your 13th man?

0:54 - After a couple of woofs, some expressed bliss when the crowd barks back Madsen gets our bilingual friends involved,

“And for those who speak Spanish: ‘Les hablababes vamos ingles da dimos, que ano benenay, loremos, otra PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!!’” Yes, I butchered the shit out of that but the accuracy is not the point. The man prepped his speech with a bit for the Spanish speaking Lakers fans. Nothing needs to be said here, only that is just amazing.

1:08 - Everyone goes wild. I wish I knew what that meant, or maybe everyone is just going wild because it was so out of the blue, legendary and fantastic. Madsen backs from the podium with hands raised, high-fiving his teammates as the crowd goes nuts. Absolutely nuts. Where are the booers now? Huh? Can’t boo someone who just spoke Spanish for no reason, can you?

1:23 - As the crowd goes nuts, the host (?) appears back at the podium with a simple,

“No wonder they call him the Mad Dog.” Indeed. Never before has a nickname fit someone so incredibly well. The man truly is a mad dog. In a good way, of course.

1:28 - Our host concludes with a quick summation of the man as a whole,

“Isn’t he something, and he’s so sincere. Just a great guy.” Say what you want about his intensity, lack of minutes and cheerleader-esque attitude -- but the man wears his heart on his sleeve and he gives 110% no matter what. For that, I applaud you Mark Madsen and I always will. I mean, hey, anyone who can cheer on Kobe Bryant and look like he enjoys must be a great person.

1:33 - The video ends with a shot of Madsen smiling and then putting his head down. Humble. Humble as pie.

What have we learned in this journey? Well, for one -- we’ve learned that Mark Madsen is the man. Two, we’ve learned that sometimes sports biggest stars don’t make their mark by putting up gaudy numbers or winning MVP awards. Sometimes, they leave their mark with effort, being a good teammate and failing to let money affect who they are.

We’ve also learned that Mark Madsen belongs on a particular NBA team where he could make the most impact and be appreciated when doing so. Have you guessed it yet? Come on, think a little harder.. A hint? You seriously want a hint?

They play on the East Coast.

No not the Seattle Supersonics, that‘s the West Coast, dimwit. Think. Another hint? Wow.

They have a player on the team known for giving 110% all the time as well.

The Miami Heat? I’m going to pretend you didn’t say that. Fine, here’s one last one.

The nickname rhymes with 'Meltics'.

That’s right! Your a quick one! The Boston Celtics! In addition to actual basketball talent, they have career bench guys like James Posey (who‘s also talented at basketball to be fair), Brian Scalabrine and Eddie House’s kid! It’s a perfect fit!

Not only have you gotten a refresher course on Mark Madsen as a person, but you’ve also just read the birth piece to a movement designed to get Mark Madsen on the 2009 Boston Celtics roster! A petition’s on the way!

Bad News Bloggers "Linkin' Logs" (6/30/2008)



In lieu of actual writing, some writers (aka, Me) at BNB realize its just easier for us to link you to more serious writers (who have talent, resources, coherent sentence structure, etc) than even attempt to write something that may be considered a journalist endeavor. That being said, on some type of basis we'll try to provide you with something to help pass the time and read over (ideally to print and read on the shitter).

More Like "Ray" Island



ESPN Sportsnation polls are always great for regional bias. Things like "Who's be best team in baseball" always leads to western states supporting the Dodgers (and Angels... I guess?) New York having a 75/25 Yankees-Mets split and New England (except for CT) giving us the Red Sox BJ.

But today, at a typical lazy day at ESPN, they asked the typical "Who had the Best Weekend" question, with the northeast and the west blowing 1-0 soccer games (ever see a 7-0 and no one giving a shit about women's golf. But the anomoly was alive and well with the yellow states...The Tampa Bay Rays are in first place. Florida voted for them (I guess that isn't surprising) and oddly enough middle America voted for them.


I will include the caveat that Wyoming was won by a landslide with a whopping 2 votes for the Rays versus 1 vote for Gay and 1 vote for Spain.

Middle America is Rays Country!
But amongst New England, A.K.A. Red Sox Nation there was one castoff (holding true to New England Tradition). Rhode Island stunningly voted for Tampa Bay (by 11% no less). Let's face facts here, when the entire population of Rhode Island votes for you (27 people), you know you've got something going...
So congrats to the Rays for finally vanquishing Red Sox Nation on the island...that isn't and island...
Next stop; Yankee Country!

Best Team in Majors??

Well, we are officially halfway through the 2008 MLB season, and we yes that's the, the Chicago Cubs, and Tampa Bay Rays are STILL their respective Division leaders. But of course, the American League continues to dominate the National League. Who is the best team in the Majors? Read on to find out.

The Candidates:

*Tampa Bay Rays (49-32; 1st in AL East)

Tampa has made the best start in their 10 year history, and, thanks to great hitting, and pitching the Rays have been in the mix all season. Rookie Evan Longoria leads the Rays with 15 homeruns, and 47 RBI's in 71 games this season. Tampa is the 12th highest scoring team in the Majors with 382 runs, and have the ninth highest team batting average. The team's pitching has been up there as well. In fact, the team's ERA is currently 3.69, fifth lowest in the League, and a .241 batting average against (good enough for second, behind the Oakland A's). A great combination of hitting, and pitching always wins games.

*Boston Red Sox (50-34; 2nd in AL East)

Slugger Manny Ramirez is on a cold streak, and injuries to pitchers have hit the Sox, but they have still managed to be the first team to reach 50 wins this season. The Sox are just a half game behind the leading Rays. The Sox have the second-best record at home (31-10), behind only the Chicago Cubs. Boston really knows how to score runs, which is, of course, the key to winning games. They are third in the league in runs scored with 424. Don't expect the Sox to allow Tampa to run away with the East.

*Chicago White Sox (46-35; 1st in AL Central)

Of all the Division leaders, I think the ChiSox may be the most surprising. They are on a four-game win streak, and just completed the sweep of the 49-33 Chicago Cubs last night. Chicago sure can hit for power, and are currently third in homeruns, with 109. The pitching has been fantastic recently, as well. The Sox are first in team ERA, and sixth in batting average against. The only threat to the Sox as of today, are the Minnesota Twins, who have won nine of their last ten games, and are just a game and a half back in the Central.

*Los Angeles Angels (49-33; 1st in AL West)

The best road team in the League hardly gets any publicity anymore. The Angels are as good as anyone right now, and if Vlad Guerrero keeps up his power surge, they could easily win the West. This team obviously doesn't score a whole lot of runs (24th in runs scored), but they find different ways to win games, and that's all that matters. If you look at it closely, you'll see their offense really hasn't been doing great at all. But, their pitching has succeeded, and pitching is just as important than hitting. I guarantee you the Angels will still be around in October.

*Chicago Cubs (49-33; 1st in NL Central)

Ah yes, the NL. Chicago was just swept by interstate rivals, the Chicago White Sox last night, but that doesn't take away from their first half success. First baseman Derek Lee, and third baseman Aramis Ramirez lead the Cubbies in hitting, which happens to be the second-highest scoring team in the League. But the Cubs are first in team batting average, and on base percentage, which are both very important in winning games. The pitching staff recently suffered a big blow to the head in the rotation when pitching ace Carlos Zambrano was placed on the DL. But they have learned to deal without him. They have done a pretty good job, too. They are tenth in team ERA, eighth in batting average against, and sixth in strikeouts. The Cubs will win the Central with no problem.

*St. Louis Cardinals (47-36; 2nd in NL Central)

Yes that's right, another team from the Central. I didn't feel the Phils (44-39; 1st in NL East), and D'Backs (41-41; 1st in NL West) were powerful enough to be mentioned on this elite list. With Albert Pujols back in the lineup, the Cards' hitting should sky-rocket. St. Louis is on a two-game win streak, and are just 2.5 games behind the Cubbies in the Central. The Cards' pitching has been pretty average this season, but their hitting has been doing pretty well. They are the ninth highest-scoring team in the League, and are fifth best in team batting average.

And the Winner is...

The Tampa Bay Rays!! You've gotta hand it to them, they've done an awesome job keeping up with the favorites, Boston. The young guys like Longoria, and B.J. Upton have had great half seasons, and Matt Garza, James Shields, and Andy Sonnanstine have had solid seasons in the rotation as well. Closer Troy Percival has had 21 save opportunities, and closed the deal in 19 of them. I don't think you could've asked for a better all-around performance from these guys.

Sunday, June 29, 2008

Daily Somehow Related to Sports Video! (6/29/2008)




So I'm cooling off after a nice day in the sun (and some rain) watching Nick at Night for the first time in probably a decade when I happen to come across a Billy Blanks Jr. video tape.

Yes.

A) Billy Blanks Junior
B) Video Tape

I couldn't stop laughing. The son of Billy Blanks, seven time world karate champion and 7th degree blackbelt followed in his father's footsteps. But not like you or I would expect (or as Blanks Sr. would hope), but by also becoming a fitness guru.
Not just any fitness guru, but releasing videos of a tae bo-esque workout, with the concept being combination karoke and cardio workouts
I'll let the youtube promo speak for itself. Needless to say, the hideous blaring of "You are Beautiful," the montage shot of the woman in pink and the 9 year old dancing all rate highly on the "We're fucking Serious" scale




Seriously...Cardioke?

R.I.P. UGA VI

Saturday the SEC got a little lonelier, as it lost one of its most famous faces. Uga VI the mascot for the Georgia Bulldogs passed away. Uga was 9 years old and passed due to heart failure. He will be greatly missed. Uga will be buried inside the Southwest corner of the Bulldogs stadium.


NFL Withdrawal Relief: The 1995 Season

As much as I’d love to partake in a journey of words about the present state of the NFL and the many story lines it has presented, I have discovered that my addicted appetite to football is better satiated in looking back at previous NFL seasons. I know I’m weird and not typically what you would call a normal person, but hopefully the majority of people who love football will feel the same way.

Instead of bitching and complaining about how there’s X amount of days until football starts, let us go on a journey of the past. I guarantee you’ve forgotten a lot of the stuff that is to be covered here and that’s okay. But to better understand the present, we must look into the past. And in this case, the past is facking awesome.

First up: The random year of 1995.

The year was 1995 and the Jacksonville Jaguars and Carolina Panthers were prepping for their inaugural seasons in the NFL. A new creation, the DVD was announced. And a little website called eBay was just founded. Suffice it to say, many things happened in the magical year of 1995. But since we’re here to talk about football, we’ll try and just focus on that.

In addition to the two new expansion teams, the two Los Angeles teams moved to other cities. The Rams were now based out of St. Louis and the Raiders out of Oakland. Things were a changing in the NFL and it wasn’t just in regards to the teams. A few major rule changes also occurred before the 1995 season. One was that the quarterback was now able to utilize a small device in his helmet to communicate with his sideline. Overweight, slow quarterbacks everywhere rejoiced.

The league was coming off a 1994 Super Bowl in which the San Francisco 49ers easily handled the Cinderella San Diego Chargers 49-26. The 49ers win further solidified the belief that the AFC was inferior to the NFC. The NFC now had eleven straight wins in as many Super Bowls and proved year after year to have the superior teams. Going into 1995, the AFC had yet to win a Super Bowl in the 90’s decade. Jim Kelly may or may not have been partially to blame.

The reigning award winners of the 1994 season looked like a Hall of Fame induction list when looked at now. Steve Young the reigning MVP, Barry Sanders the reigning Offensive Player of the Year, Deion Sanders the reigning Defensive Player of the Year. And a promising, young running back named Marshall Faulk was coming off a respectable year in which he was named Offensive Rookie of the Year. Wow, this is making me feel old.

The road to Super Bowl 30 was not surprising for some teams while there were others, like the Detroit Lions who exceeded expectations and scrapped their way into the playoffs. Unfortunately for Lions fans, it would be the last hurrah for the next.. Well, they still haven’t had a similar season and the present year is 2008. So, it was the last great year for Lions fans. The year 1995. Thirteen years ago. Sorry Lions fans.

While the Jacksonville Jaguars had a typical expansion season, finishing 4-12 and last place in the AFC Central, the Carolina Panthers were a different story. Playing in an equally tough NFC West the Panthers finished a respectable 7-9 and finished tied for third place in the division.

The struggling New York Jets would go on to have the worst record in the league at 3-13, earning them the first pick in the 1996 NFL Draft (which turned out to be superstar/future pre-game show All Star Keyshawn Johnson). The Kansas City Chiefs would go on to have the league’s best record, finishing 13-3. They’re record did not translate into postseason success however and they lost their first divisional playoff game to the Indianapolis Colts, 10-7.

The 1995 season also turned out to be the year that Art Moddell decided to move the Browns to Baltimore in what started a firestorm of debate across the world of the NFL. Many were all for it, while others were passionately against it. It was eventually of no matter, the Browns would again return to the NFL fold some years later. Luckily for us!

Like every year, 1995 held host to some thrilling divisional and wild card races. The Tampa Bay Buccaneers, perennial losers year after year made a strong run for a playoff bid, led by the strong play of running back Eric Rhett. They would fall short however and finish the season 7-9.

The AFC West also saw heated competition, with no one in the division going under .500. The AFC East on the other hand saw three of it’s teams make the post-season, and the AFC Central saw just one team (the Pittsburgh Steelers) gaining a bid to the playoffs.

The NFC saw a bit more parity, with two teams from each division making the playoffs. This was due to the fact that although the NFC was the stronger of the two conferences, there was a severe drop off from the elite NFC teams and everyone else who was competing. The six teams that made the playoffs in the NFC, save for the Detroit Lions, were perennial contenders year in and year out.

The 1995 Wild Card round failed to feature even one competitive game. The Bills defeated their division rival Dolphins 37-22 and the Colts defeated the reigning Super Bowl runners-up Chargers 35-20 to round off the AFC. The Eagles beat the Cinderella Lions 58-37 in what was one of the highest scoring playoff games of all time. The Packers easily handled the Falcons 37-20 and were the last team to sneak into the divisional playoff round.

The divisional round had similar blowouts but managed to produce some close contests. The best of which being the Colts-Chiefs game, which was a defensive struggle and ended with the Colts advancing to the conference championships with a 10-7 victory. Unfortunately, the Chiefs best regular season record did not translate to postseason success. Weird. In another close game, the Packers defeated the defending Super Bowl Champion 49ers 27-17. The Cowboys spanked the Eagles 30-11 and the Steelers easily handled the Bills 40-21.

The conference championship games, unlike many of the other playoff games, would not fail to disappoint. The Steelers barely handled the Colts in a thrilling 20-16 win whereas the Cowboys pulled away late 38-27 to defeat the Packers. Brett Favre was still a year away from being a champion.

Super Bowl XXX would prove to be an uncompetitive game, completely opposite of what the final score would indicate. The Cowboys were the victors 27-17 in what would be the first of many 1990’s Super Bowl wins for the franchise.

If you didn’t know, than now you know. Stay tuned for other random NFL season years!

Some 1995 Snippets:

MVP: Brett Favre
Coach of the Year: Ray Rhodes
Offensive Rookie of the Year: Curtis Martin
Defensive Rookie of the Year: Hugh Douglas

Sunday Morning Quarterback; Overpaid Rookies

I am starting a new series, called...Well, just look at the title "Sunday Morning Quarterback". Yes, we can talk NFL Football even during the offseason. Not much going on in the NFL right now, but training camps open in about a month! Is that exciting or what??

The biggest topic up for debate today is Commissioner Roger Goodell's reaction to overpaid rookies. I brought this up on Armchairgm.com around the time of the 2007 NFL draft. I believe I said something like "Brady Quinn is going to be overpaid, and end up being a draft bust", and this was before he fell down to the 22nd overall pick by the Cleveland Browns.

The topic was brought back up after this year's draft when first overall pick, Jake Long (drafted by Miami) signed a five-year contract worth $57.75 million. He signed the contract on April 22nd, which was BEFORE the draft even took place in New York City. What happens if Long gets in some kind of accident before the draft even takes place?! The Dolphins would be screwed then.

Goodell's reaction to the situation? Well, he started out by saying the pay roll for rookies is 'ridiculous', and then had this to say about it: "There's something wrong about the system, the money should go to people who perform. He doesn't have to play a down in the NFL and he already has his money. Now, with the economics where they are, the consequences if you don't evaluate that player, you can lose a significant amount of money." He then went on to say: "And that money is not going to players that are performing. It's going to a player that never makes it in the NFL. And I think that's ridiculous."

I think every NFL fan out there can agree with Goodell's statement. Rookies obviously shouldn't be paid millions of bucks before they even step foot out on the field, and prove themselves. My apologies to Ryan Leaf, but I'm gonna have to use you as an example. I mean, god knows what could happen. We may very well get another Ryan Leaf. Heck, you could even end up drafting a Tim Couch, Spergon Wynn, or Eric Crouch. Not a single NFL team wants that. So, in order to fix this, just don't give these guys a long-term, big money contract until they prove themselves.

My solution: A rather simple one. Don't sign them to long-term contracts. The problem is that that could cause players to holdout for more money. I guess we should just let Roger work his magic...

Saturday, June 28, 2008

No Hits? No Problem!

File this under; "yeah, I don't get it either." Apparently the Battle of LA was one hell of a barnburner with a combined 5 hits. But the best part of the whole scenario was, the Dodgers had none of 'em...but they still got the win.

It all stems from an error on the nub of a hit by Matt Kemp, who subsequently stole second and arrived at third on a throwing error by the catcher. Add in Blake Dewitt's sacrifice fly and we've got a run.

Sadly for Jered Weaver he was pulled in the 6th in favor of a pinch hitter and worse yet, since the Dodgers had the lead (at home) going into the bottom of the 9th, the Angels can't score this as a no-no.

If you're a Dodgers fan right now, I guess you can call this one Lemonade

Dutton Pulls off Close Upset at Utah

It may not be the NFL, but don't underestimate the excitement of the Arena Football Playoffs. Earlier today John Dutton and his fifth seeded Colorado Crush (owned by Denver's own J0hn Elway) upset the fourth seeded Utah Blaze. Both teams, unfortunately, finished the season 6-10 though. Yes, yes, I know it's kinda lame that a 6-10 made it to the playoffs, but the game proved to be an exciting one.

Danny White's Utah Blaze were on a win streak of four games coming into today, and were looking for their first ever playoff win (0-2 in playoffs). Keep in mind that the Blaze started out the season 0-9, and then went on a route to win six of the final seven regular season games. If this was the NFL neither team would be anywhere close to the playoffs. But, it's not, is it?? This is a whole different league. A league in which twelve of the seventeen, yes seventeen teams make the playoffs. This means that the Los Angeles Avengers, Kansas City Brigade, Columbus Destroyers (the Arena League's 2007 runner-up), Tampa Bay Storm, and the New Orleans Voodoo were the five left out of the second season.

Joe Germaine, who should've been named to the All-Arena first team (instead it was Philly's Matt D'Orazio), led his Blaze to a quick 14-0 lead in the first quarter. But, Dutton is a gamer, and he lead the Crush on a scoring drive which ended with about two minutes to go in the opening quarter. In the second quarter, the Crush outscored the Blaze 14-10, and with seconds to go until the half, made it a three-point game on a two-yard pass to WR Wendall Williams. It was only Willams' third game with Colorado.

Germaine--who finished the game with 252 yards through the air, 6 TD passes, and 1 INT--cooled off in the second half. The last two quaters were evenly-matched, and it ended up being a back-and-forth half. The B.M.W (Boone, McKelvey, Whittaker) combination for Utah combined for 22 of Utah's 23 pass attempts, and all six of their TD's. Utah's three second-half TD's were just not enough to stop Colorado from advancing.

Two costly sacks on Germaine had the Colorado bench pumped, and actually one of the commentators, former NFL DE Marcellus Wiley, was real close to throwing his headphones aside, and jumping into action.

Germaine was rattled, and the two late sacks, and 1 INT, forced by a the Colorado D-line, was the final straw. After one last Utah touchdown with :36 to go, Utah failed to recover the onside kick, and the game was over.

My worry for Colorado's Divisional matchup (whoever that may be), is that their kicker Deric Yaussi, missed two key kicks, and was close to missing a few of his extra point attempts (though they all ended up going in). In the playoffs you can't have your kicker going 0 for 2 on kicks, there's just no excuse. Especially in an arena with no wind/weather factor. Yaussi, and actually the Blaze's kicker, Steve Videtich, looked pretty shaky. Videtich was 1 for 2 on field goal attempts, and missed a key extra point attempt. That's FOUR points right there.

One of the most amusing parts of the game was when, on a Colorado kickoff, Yaussi was running downfield looking to block someone, and got light the fuck up by a Utah defender. He jumped back up and got in his face. That was a horrible decision. Whoever heard of a kicker doing that!? I thought it was pretty funny. That was a rookie mistake...

Daily Somehow Related to Sports Video! (6/28/08)

I just finished a sweaty game of wiffle ball. This video is actually pretty classic but if I could come up with more than one pitch on par with this guy, I'd be set (All I've got is a devastating sinker)



Personally, I like the behind the plate camera action (mostly at the end!). No way the fat guy in the cage could hit the riser.

CoreStates/First Union/Wachovia/The Spectrum Set to be Demolished in the Coming Year


Since the Flyers and 76ers move to the "FU" Center in 1996, the old place hasn't quite been the same, but former Calder Cup Champion Philadelphia Phantoms and the Philadelphia Kixx (whatever they play?) have made the Spectrum their home for the last few years. As announced in January, that trend won't continue, as Spectrum owner, Comcast-Spectator, will have the building demolished in order to construct a new sports complex in its place.

The sports complex on Broad Street now consists of the Wachovia Center (1996), Lincoln Financial Field (2003), Citizens Bank Ballpark (2004) and the elder statesman, The Spectrum, which opened in 1967. It is unknown what will replace the Spectrum's arena capabilities (or where the teams who use it will go) but its current land will go towards Comcast's "Philly Live" project, consisting of shops, restaurants and a hotel directly where the old barn sits now.

While the loss of such a large part of sports history in Philadelphia is slightly saddening, its nothing new, as the turnaround on Broad Street buildings happens roughly every couple decades (faster if it really sucks...see Veterans Stadium).

So for now, we'll prepare our goodbyes... for the best damn place to see a WWF show.

Friday, June 27, 2008

Umpires Bumping Managers

It is about a time an umpire be suspended for bumping a manager Jerry Manuel but the suspension Brian Runge got for one day was not fair to all the managers and players who have received longer suspension for the same offense.

Runge clearly egged on the situation by taking his mask off and sweeping off home plate while arguing with Carlos Beltran. There is no doubt the bumping of Beltran was intentional as Runge was shown bumping Manuel on television.

Baseball needs to tell the umpires they are there to control the game and not become part of the problem by physically getting involved in altercations with managers and players.

The Daily Somehow Related To Sports Video!

In a new daily feature here at B.N.B. I, or one of the other forty two authors will post a video for your viewing pleasure. We’ll try our best to make it about sports, but if it’s not.. well, there are other things in the world besides sports you know, so quit your bitching. The cherry popper: An absolute classic commercial featuring M.J. and Larry Bird from the year 1523.



Some afterthoughts:

What in the world was M.J. wearing? Even he can’t pull that outfit off..

If Larry Bird wasn’t fantastic at basketball, he wouldn’t have had much else going for him..

They over exaggerated that game of H.O.R.S.E. a taaaaaaaaad too much..

Big Mac’s are fucking gross..

Arena Football: Wild Card Playoff Matchups/Predictions

Later tonight is the first game of the 2008 Arena Football League Playoffs. The sixth ranked New York Dragons will attempt to knock off the 12-4 Dallas Desperados. The game will kick-off at 7:30 PM ET on ESPN. Be sure to tune in.

Here is a look at all four of the Wild Card matchups this weekend, along with the Divisional Round matchups (according to my Wild Card picks).

Friday June 27th
6 New York Dragons @ 3 Dallas Desperados

Can the Dragons follow Eli Manning's road in New York, and upset the favorites in Dolezel, and the Desperados? I think the answer is a plain and simple, NO. Dolezel knows how this league works, and doesn't make many mistakes. He knows how to get the job done, unlike NY's Aaron Garcia, who failed to lead New York to the playoffs the past two years. New York's offense was 15th in total offense throughout the regular season, and remember that the AFL had just 17 teams this season. Dolezel leads Dallas to big win, 64-48.

Saturday June 29th
5 Colorado Crush @ 4 Utah Blaze

Ah, yes...the first upset of the postseason. Colorado QB John Dutton has had a solid season under center, and I think he will lead Colorado to a first-round win over the Blaze despite great QB play during the regular season. Utah's offense, which is led by Joe Germaine, was the second-highest scoring offense in the entire Arena-League this year, behind only the number two team in the Western Conference, the Georgia Force. But, I'm feeling an upset. Dutton passed for 4,548 yards this season, which was fifth best in the League. Dutton has the leadership skills, and the ring (2005) to back up my prediction. Colorado over Utah, 62-55.

Monday June 30th
5 Orlando Predators @ 4 Cleveland Gladiators

In their first season in Cleveland, the Gladiators went 9-7, good enough for third place in the Eastern Division of the National Conference. Cleveland's QB Raymond Philyaw, former Chicago Rush, and Kansas City Brigade QB, threw for 83 TD's, and 10 INT's this season, and has done a nice job leading this team, ranked seventh in total offense. Cleveland was also second in the league in rushing with 497 yards on the ground, and a 3.2 YPC. No upset here, I believe the Gladiators will finally win a postseason game, which will be the first since 1998, when they were known as the New Jersey Red Dogs (they went 8-6, and second place in the Eastern Division). Cleveland over Orlando, 52-48.

6 Grand Rapids Rampage @ 3 Arizona Rattlers

For a second straight season, the Rattlers finish in second place, going 8-8. But, this year was different, Arizona earned the third seed in the Western Conference. But, I'm not too sure Arizona will have much success, despite the Grand Rapids 6-10 regular season record. The Rampage are on a three-game win streak, and QB James McPherson is on a hot streak. McPherson threw for 80 TD passes, and just 16 INT's with a 118.7 QB Rating in 14 games this season. McPherson's hot streak, and the fact that Arizona has a situation at the QB position leads me to believe that the Rampage will pull off the upset. GR 51, ARI 42.

Divisional Matchups:

American Conference
6 Grand Rapids Rampage @ 1 Chicago Rush
5 Colorado Crush @ 2 San Jose Sabercats

National Conference
4 Cleveland Gladiators @ 1 Philadelphia Soul
3 Dallas Desperados @ 2 Georgia Force

Bill Simmons Goes Down on Love and Gay


I used to read Bill Simmons semi-religiously. Not to the point where I couldn’t wait for his next article, but to the point where I’d check a few times a week for his serious 3,000 words of bathroom material (probably a solid 2 poops as he would say). Problem was, with each Boston Championship, he became a little more intolerable and I quit after the Red Sox 2007 World Series Win

I quit you Bill.

Cold Turkey.

Haven’t really gone back since. Sometimes, when I know he’s about to release a gem (like his NBA Draft Diary) or he’s relatively unbiased, I’ll be sure to stop by, but for the most part, I just stopped.

But honestly, you can only read so much “The Patriots are so great, I wanna get me some Tom Brady Lovin’” and “My dad called me and my buddy house and said…”

That’s great Bill, I have friends too…we also make fun of stupid things in sports. And in there lies the problem, as Simmons represents the common man. But so common, that its not something you or I couldn’t do every day, if we could commit the hours to watching numerous games and having ESPN foot the bill for our DirectTV NFL package.

The case in point was today, when Good Ole Bill decided to take the low-hanging fruit. In reference to the Memphis Grizzlies selection of Kevin Love, Simmons declared the beginning of the “Gay-Love Era.” Fantastic Bill, you and every other 13 year old blogger have thought of this at the same time.

Now, as someone of a conceited low-class blogger, I take offense to Simmons trying to steal our material. Just classless, if you ask me.

But Simmons doesn’t stop with bad jokes. Oh no, he goes one step further, bashing the Devils Rays signing of Troy Percival…or did he?

Besides, my favorite part of listening to the "BS Report" isn't Simmons at all, but everyone else's reaction to his podcast. Which is typically: "That douchebag is Simmons?!"

Blogger Q&A: Manny Stiles


Name:
Erik Kombol

Nickname:
Manny Stiles th' Komillion

Favorite Sports Team:
Tampa Bay Rays

Favorite Player of all time:
(after myself?) King Kelly

Favorite food:
Lobsters stuffed with tacos

Favorite drink:
Lemonade (but if you mean "adult beverage", it's Patrón Añejo)
If you could take three things with you on a deserted island, what would they be?:
A motorboat, gas and GPS device.

Favorite word:
Thesaurus (did you know - it's NOT a kind of dinosaur?)

If you could be an animal, what animal would you be and why:
One of those cats that has a crazy millionaire owner that dies and left everything to me in their will. If I gotta lick myself to get clean, I want it all...

Favorite sporting moment of all time:
I can't narrow it down to just one. But I'm prominently involved in all of them.

What do you bring to the table?:
Voluminous wiles.

What do you take off the table?:
an empty plate - I don't mind cleaning my own dishes...

If you could have lunch with any three people in the world, who would it be and why:
My wife and two kids - they matter more than anyone to me. Besides, the other people I'd consider (Hunter S Thompson, Dorothy Parker and Joseph Campbell) are all dead. Who wants to have lunch with rotting corpses?

Describe yourself in one word:
freek (not "freak" - freek)
Favorite Sport and Why:
Fishing. Because you can fail more miserably at it than any other sport and still have a good time getting drunk. Plus you get to eat your final score.

Love for Mayo...and other NBA Draft Trades

The Timberwolves drafted USC Guard O.J. Mayo, who has some character issues, at third overall in last night's NBA draft. Overall, I thought it was a good pick. But, a few hours after the draft, while everyone, including Mayo, was sleeping the T'Wolves agreed to trade Mayo. Minnesota, and the Memphis Grizzlies, who drafted former UCLA Forward Kevin Love, agreed to exchange their first-round draft picks. So, Love is on his way to Minnesota, and Mayo will be headed to Memphis.

Personally, I think getting either Love or Mayo for Minnesota is a good move, the Timberwolves need help all over the court. Twenty-four year old Randy Foye, and twenty-nine year old Marko Jaric are currently the 'Wolves two starting guards. Aren't guards suppose to be scorers?? Well, this past season Foye averaged 13.1 PPG, and Jaric averaged 8.3 PPG. That's more like center-type numbers. Which reminds me, the 'Wolves 6'10'' 256 pound center, Al Jefferson, averaged 21 PPG, and 11.1 RPG in 2007. I think it's pretty sad that their center is a higher-scorer than the two guards, PUT TOGETHER!!

After saying that, I think it was a bad move trading away Mayo, who scored 20 PPG with USC. But, either way, I think both Mayo, and Kevin Love will make an immediate impact with their respective teams.

Another trade I didn't agree with is the Detroit Pistons trade of their draft pick, 29th overall, D.J. White. White, former Indiana PF, can score, and rebound. The 6'9'', 251 pound White can be compared to Amare Stoudamire. He started all 33 games in 2007, and scored 17.4 PPG, grabbed 10.3 boards a game, and hit 60 percent of his shots from the field. I really saw this guy taking Rasheed's place at PF/C in Detroit. I even picked him at 29 overall on AGM's NBA Mock Draft.

But, shortly after drafting White, the Pistons personnel thought it would do them good to trade him to Seattle. In exchange, the Pistons got Seattle's second round pick (32nd overall). With this pick, Detroit drafted PF 6'9'', 245 pound Walter Sharpe from UAB!?!?

Apparently they would rather have a guy with a shorter track record, and averages 14 PPG, and 6 RPG. Sharpe only hit half of his free throws in 12 games in 2007. This may just be the most puzzling move of the draft, especially as a Pistons fan. Someone is going to have to explain this one to me, because I just don't understand it...

2008 NBA Draft :The final results


Alright we all saw the NBA Draft last night and there was plenty of action all night long. Now I'm opening the floor for discussion. Here are the results, what do you think? Winners, losers who went too high, who fell short? Let me know what you think.

1) Chicago Bulls: Derrick Rose

2) Miami Heat: Michael Beasley

3) Minnesota Timberwolves (traded to Memphis): O.J. Mayo

4)Seattle Sonics:Russell Westbrook

5)Memphis Grizzlies (traded to Minnesota): Kevin Love

6)New York Knicks: Danilo Gallinari

7)LA Clippers: Eric Gordon

8)Milwaukee Bucks: Joe Alexander

9)Charlotte Bobcats: D.J. Augustin

10)New Jersey Nets: Brook Lopez

11)Indiana Pacers (traded to Portland): Jerrd Bayless

12)Sacramento Kings: Jason Thompson

13)Portland Trailblazers: (traded to Indiana): Brandon Rush

14)Golden State Warriors: Anthony Randolph

15)Phoenix Suns (
from Atlanta): Robin Lopez

16)Philadelphia 76'ers: Marreese Speights

17)Toronto Raptors (traded to Indiana): Roy Hibbert

18)Washington Wizards: JaVale McGee

19)Cleveland Cavaliers: J.J. Hickson

20)Charlotte Bobcats (from Denver): Alexis Ajinca

21)New Jersey Nets (from Dallas): Ryan Anderson

22)Orlando Magic: Courtney Lee

23)Utah Jazz: Kosta Koufos

24)Seattle Sonics (from Phoenix): Serge Ibaka

25)Houston Rockets (traded to Portland): Nicolas Batum

26)San Antonio Spurs: George Hill

27)New Orleans Hornets (traded to Memphis from Houston and Portland): Darrell Arthur

28)Memphis Grizzlies (from LA Lakers): Donte Green

29)Detroit Pistons (traded to Seattle): D.J. White

30)Boston Celtics: J.R. Giddens

Round 2

31)Minnesota Timberwolves (from Miami through Boston): Nikola Pekovic

32)Seattle Sonics (traded to Detroit):Walter Sharpe

33)Portland Trailblazers (from Memphis): Joey Dorsey

34)Minnesota Timberwolves (traded to Miami):Mario Chalmers

35)LA Clippers: DeAndre Jordan

36)Portland Trailblazers (from New York, traded to Chicago): Omer Asik

37)Milwaukee Bucks: Luc Richard Mbaha Moute

38)Charlotte Bobcats: Kyle Weaver

39)Chicago Bulls: Sonny Weems

40)New Jersey Nets: Chris Douglas-Roberts

41)Indiana Pacers: Nathan Jawai

42)Sacramento Kings (from Atlanta): Sean Singletary

43)Sacramento Kings: Patrick Ewing Jr.

44)Utah Jazz (from Philadelphia): Ante Tomic

45)San Antonio Spurs (from Toronto): Goran Dragic

46)Seattle Sonics (from Portland through Boston traded to Detroit): Trent Plaisted

47)Washington Wizards (traded to Boston): Bill Walker

48)Phoenix Suns (from Cleveland): Malik Hairston

49)Golden State Warriors: Richard Hendrix

50)Seattle Sonics (from Denver): DeVon Hardin

51)Dallas Mavericks: Shan foster

52)Miami Heat (from Orlando): Darnell Jackson

53)Utah Jazz: Tadija Dragicevic

54)Houston Rockets: Maarty Leunen

55)Portland Trailblazers (from Phoenix through Indiana, traded to LA Clippers): Mike Taylor

56)Seattle Sonics (from New Orleans through Houston): Sasha Kaun

57)San Antonio Spurs: James Gist

58)LA Lakers: Joe Crawford

59)Detroit Pistons: Deron Washington

60)Boston Celtics: Semih Erden

Thursday, June 26, 2008

The Real Sporting World, Episode Five: Make it Rain!

Clips are shown from the last few episodes, culminating in the fact that the lie detector test and Clemens’ replacement are both taking place tonight. In a surprising twist, instead of showing each lie detector test in full, clips are shown of certain questions to our athletes in a montage. Some playful, circus music is playing in the background. Hey, the producers aren’t going to win any awards for this show, but they try! The fun starts off with an opening shot of McBeam.


McBeam: “Okay, after you give the answer to your question -- it will either emit a short low beep if you told the truth, or an obnoxious, fire alarm-esque siren if you lied. So it would behoove you tell the truth.” He starts laughing. Has he already started consuming his Jim Beam?


McBeam: “This is from Doug, who hails from Dover, Delaware. He wants to know, ‘Will you please stop doing so many commercials?’”


Peyton: “Never.” A short beep is heard. What a shocker.


McBeam: “Tom, this ones from Becky from Montpiliar, Vermont. ‘In all seriousness, how many times do you look in the mirror each day?’”


Brady: “Uhh..” He frowns, knowing he has to tell the truth. “I dunno, fifteen -- twenty times?” A short beep confirms our worst fears. Or most passionate desires.


McBeam: “Mark, no one at all submitted a question for you -- so we made one up ourselves: ‘Do you take any kind of medication?’”


Madsen: “Only the medication of the love for basketball!” He raises his hands, completely oblivious to the obnoxious fire alarm sound that informs everyone that was just a lie. “I LOVE BASKETBALL BABY, WOO!”


In between the montage, a silhouette is shown of someone approaching the Real Sporting World House. Could it be Clemens replacement? And why so quickly?


McBeam: “David from Chi-Town, USA wants to know LaDainian: ‘How much does Vizio pay you to pimp their product?’”


LaDainian: “What is that supposed to mean?” He frowns. “They don’t pay me anything! They don’t need too!” A short beep confirms what we’ve all known all along: L.T. just loves him some Vizio’s!


The silhouette is shown opening up the door of the house.


McBeam: “Okay, A-Rod. You ready?” The door can be heard opening. “Oh! Our replacement for Roger is here already!”


Peyton: “Wait, already?”


McBeam: “Yes, we actually have another place nearby that houses six other potential replacement athletes. I can’t tell you who they are though -- but your about to learn who one of them is.”


Brady: “Who’s the producer of this show? Is he alright?”

The camera cuts to the front door of the house, showing it slowly open. It reveals:

Pacman Jones!


Pacman: “What up, pimps!?”


He’s smoking what appears to be a large cigar.


McBeam: “Welcome Pacman!” He scurries over to try and shake his hand. Is McBeam a Cowboys fan?


Pacman: “Yo! Step the fuck back, PUPPET!” He points at McBeam.


McBeam: “Pacman, it’s cool -- I’m the host!”


Pacman: “I said step back!” He starts stepping towards McBeam.


McBeam: “Okay, fine, fine!” He starts backing up.


Pacman grabs a lamp from a nearby table and charges our mascot. He smashes Steely in the face several times. The show’s producers make a note to change this to a TV-MA program.


Pacman: “WHAT?! WHAT NOW!?” Several other housemates run over to peel him off of Steely. “I WARNED YOU PUPPET!” He’s pointing at Steely, very much bullshit. Steely is unconscious where he was beaten. Whether it was the lamp upside the face a couple times, his Jim Beam consumption, or a mixture of the two, the athlete’s love of Steely is shown by nearly everyone crowding around him. Everyone except Mad Dog.


Madsen: “Yo Pacman! THANK YOU! I HATED THAT PUPPET!” He offers a high-five to Pacman, who looks at him as if he was a strip club without booze.



Pacman: “STEP BACK!” He points at Madsen. A random person clad in black suddenly appears. He is seen escorting Pacman away with various, MMA type skills. The ruckus dies down once the legend is gone. The camera cuts back into the lie detector montage.


McBeam: “Manny, Jose from Costa Rica would like to know: ‘Plantains or flan? What is the better breakfast?’”


Manny: “He crazy! Everyone know is FLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!!!!!” He points at the ceiling, grinning.


McBeam: “Okay A-Rod, Doug from the Bronx, NY would like to know: ‘Why are you infecting my team with your fakely intense, I‘m not gay but act it lifestyle!! GO BACK TO SEATTLE!!’”


A-Rod: “Wait, what was the question?”


McBeam: “Okay, Pau -- no one knew we’d be asking you questions so like Mad Dog, we thought up some for you by ourselves. What planet are you from? Seriously..”


Gasol: “Whatever planet milord came from, I am from also. It is the way of the universe.”


The camera cuts to a shot of Gasol being escorted out of the house. Kobe wipes his brow.


McBeam: “Kobe, Michaela from Champagne, Illinois would like to know: ‘Is your favorite color baby blue?’”


Kobe: “Damn right it is!” He shrugs, as if this was the dumbest question ever. Hm.. fishy.


The camera cuts to Steely being taken from the house on a stretcher. Once he’s gone, our athletes stand around like a bunch of dumb asses for a bit -- until Mad Dog begins to run towards the basement.


Madsen: “BOOOOOOOOOOOOZEEEEE!!”


Everyone smiles. Was that a bonding moment we just witnessed?

The cheesy, end of the show reality music plays, followed by a big drum sound and a preview of next week.

Next week on the Real Sporting World: Will McBeam be back as our well beloved host? Is Pacman seriously a real person? Who will replace Clemens/Pacman’s spot and is it a cursed position? You’ll have to wait and see, next week on The Real Sporting World!

Blogger Q&A with BigPPup


Name: Dumont Walker

Nickname: Predator on account of the way my dreadlocks look when I’m playing rugby. BigPPup… yeah long story that I don’t even remember anymore since I’ve had it so long.

Favorite Sports Team: University of Virginia anything they play


Favorite Player of all time: Ali


Favorite food: Wings if I’m lounging around and watching the game. Other than that, give me a good steak (NY Strip or Porterhouse) and a potato.

Favorite drink: Beer, Miller Lite at the bar, High Life at the house, and Amstel when I want to step it up a notch. Don’t forget the Southern Comfort either.


If you could take three things with you on a deserted island, what would they be?

Gotta have my laptop and some Wifi, I’d also want to have a solid supply of rum or whiskey because I mean damn I’m on an Island what else is there to do but drink and go to the beach? Last I want to have a rugby ball so I’d something to do, practice my kicking or something. Plus drunken rugby is great.

Favorite word: Bro but has to be said with a South African or a Kiwi accent.


If you could be an animal, what animal would you be and why: Cat, I know it’s been said already, but I look at my cats and they have the world handed to them. They sleep in my bed when I have to go to work. When they are hungry they get fed, they get whatever they want so it’s a nice life.

Favorite sporting moment of all time: 2004 UVA scores about 35 unanswered points against Va Tech in the last game of the season. I’m in Scott Stadium with my closest friends and we got to storm the field and pop our shoe on the 50.


What do you bring to the table? I am the whole show. I love sports. I’ve played sports my entire lie. I love all sports not just the typical American big ones.

What do you take off the table? Not possible next question.


If you could have lunch with any three people in the world, who would it be and why:
Bill Clinton, Tiger Woods, My dad,


Describe yourself in one word: Phenomenal

Favorite sport and why: Rugby is my favorite especially since I still play, but football is my passion.

The Best Seats in Baseball, I think not


In general, when I surf the net (in this case, while watching the 4th tier league's draft), I keep a few sites up for viewing while I wait for another page (typical of crappy quality) to load. It's not that I have dial-up or surf the net at the public library, just that I'm very finicky...and have the attention span of a 2 year old...dog.

Well, one of the sites I leave tabbed is Facebook and what should greet my eyes on my facebook homepage today but another advertisement.

Typically, Facebook ads are just invasive (because they know everything I do) and scare the crap out of me (nothing compared to the Gmail mind reading sidebar). But this one just pissed me off. Its not that I know where the best seats are or don't fully grasp the autonomy of the add, its just that its plain old factually inaccurate.

So I went to trusty google to get the answer to my question (typing in: "best seats in baseball"). Sure enough, the first sport was a little ESPN piece of garbage declaring the Red Sox as the best.
This is also false (sorry Google, you missed the boat on this) because our buddy at ESPN, Josh Pahigian, who wrote this "Special to ESPN SportsTravel" declared the new "Monster Seats" to be the best "seats" in baseball.

As an aside, I'd like to point out that I, too, am baffled that ESPN has/had a "SportsTravel" section, group, team of writers of what have you but I'm not surprised that they funded some asshole to go to sports venues around the country and say; "Hey they gave me the best seats in the house...this is well worth my price of admission...which was nothing."

Sorry, aside number 2. I was also stunned to learn that the "Green Monstah" is the 2nd largest outfield wall in baseball, just getting beaten by the "Arch Nemisis" in none other than York, PA. Why should you care. You shouldn't but I happened to be born in Lancaster, PA, which is right next to York...so it was a fun fact for me.

But my point, beyond all this blabbering, is that these "Green Monster" seats, declared the best in baseball by anti-christ ticket brokers and joe blow of ESPN, are on par with beating Tiger Woods on one leg at the US Open in difficulty (AKA Practically Impossible). You just can't get them for face value (unless you consider $1,000 plus from StubHub "Face value"). The way "Monster seats" are picked up is via a lottery system prior to the season. And you enter the lottery by becoming a member of Red Sox Nation (and paying ten bucks!). Then you have, what I guess to be, about a 1 in 20 shot of getting a ticket. Yeah, seriously, One Ticket.

But more than that, Fenway is known for obstructed views, cramped uncomfrotable seats and urinal troughs (talk about class!). Its a quaint park, its a part of history, but personally, once you've go

So the best seats in baseball? I think not.

Blogger Q&A: Behbigben15

Name: Ben Heck

Nickname: Big Ben

Favorite Sports Team: Pittsburgh Steelers

Favorite Player of all time: Well, I am only a young'n, so I grew up watching guys like Kordell Stewart, Kent Graham, Tommy Maddox, and of course Ben Roethlisberger quarterbacking the Steelers. Ben Roethlisberger is by far my favorite player, and he also happens to be the reason my nickname is "Big Ben". Roethlisberger is only 26 years old and he's already a Super Bowl champion, and is a pro bowler. In my short life, I don't think I've seen a QB better at avoiding the rush than Ben. Every snap he has the potential to turn nothing into something, and I am more and more confident in his skills every year. Jerome Bettis, the future Hall of Fame RB, is a very close second.

Favorite food: Spaghetti, of course. Who doesn't like spaghetti!?

Favorite drink: Well...I am too young to legally drink, so I'll have to go with my favorite soda, Mountain Dew.

If you could take three things with you on a deserted island, what would they be?: Hmmm...I would say food, my computer (haha), and my girlfriend (that is, IF she counts as a "thing").

Favorite word: Since I write, I don't think I can play favorites...I LIKE ALL WORDS!!

If you could be an animal, what animal would you be and why: I would be a tiger of course! I know for a fact that no human would want to stand face to face with a tiger, and when I hear the word tiger, I think of Tiger Woods...Do I really have to elaborate on that? I mean, this is arguably the best golfer of all-time we're talking about.

Favorite sporting moment of all time: I would have to go with Super Bowl XL. The only Steelers Super Bowl victory that occurred during my lifetime. It was a great feeling knowing that "The Bus" finally won the big one, and went out a champion. Very few athletes have had that chance.

What do you bring to the table?: I'm not really the one to ask. I just do my thing, I'll bring whatever you want to the table. Read a few of my articles, and YOU tell me what I bring to the table.

What do you take off the table?: Okay, this is a little easier than the question above. I obviously am young, and don't know as much as all you older bloggers. Give me about ten years or so, and ask me again. That would be my biggest flaw. I haven't had that much experience at this stuff. I joined Armchairgm.com on April 19th, 2007. Before then, I was just a sports fan, I had ZERO writing experience (other than the language arts/english classes I was taking in school).

If you could have lunch with any three people in the world, who would it be and why: In the sporting world? I'll go with Walter Payton, because he was (apparently) quite a person, and really loved the game, and knew how to play it the right way. And, I'll stick with what I know best, the Pittsburgh Steelers: Jack Lambert, he's a legend in Pittsburgh, and may just be one of the greatest LBers of all-time. He was simply a beast. The third person will be my current idol, Ben Roethlisberger. I have way too many questions I would love to ask him, and there are many things I would like to know about him. Call me crazy, weird, retarded..WHATEVER you want, those three guys would be the people I would choose to have lunch with first. But to tell you the truth, I would love to have lunch with any athlete in this large world. I don't hate or even really dislike any athletes, there all my idols.

Describe yourself in one word: Exhilarating...yes, that's right, I can use big words, too.

Favorite sport and why: I would definitely have to say American Football..in particular, the NFL. I really can't explain the real reason I enjoy watching, and playing football. Mainly because, I simply don't know the reason. I fell in love with the sport at a very young age (possibly at around age 3?). I just love everything about the game; the players, coaches, equipment, strategy, etc etc etc.

...That's all I've got.

Q&Apostrophe...


[key dramatic entrance music]

Name: Andrew...

Nickname(s): Falcon because... I actually can't remember far enough back to remember why. Apostrophe because I can be a philosophiser and that is the name I use...

Favorite Sports Team: I have been a Eagles fan for years but I didn't really get into football until I was in my teenage years. I jumped on the Tampa Bay Rays bandwagon at the beginning of this season, but I am more a fan of baseball than a specific team. I also root for the Phillies, but that is a new thing I'm trying. The only team I have been a huge fan of my entire life is the Philadelphia Flyers. So I'm going to say my favorite team is the boys in Orange and Black...

Favorite Player of all time: As a baseball fan, growing up, everyone wanted to be Junior Griffey. Baseball being my favorite sport and Griff being one of the best players ever, it is not hard to say he is my number one...

Favorite food: I SCREAM, you SCREAM, we all SCREAM for ICE CREAM! There are just so many different flavors and combinations and it's just the most amazing innovation ever...

Favorite drink: Against the wishes of Adam Sandler, I'm going to go with Gatorade. I'm always active, so I need that will keep up...

If you could take three things with you on a deserted island, what would they be? Carmella DeCesare because she belongs in a coconut bikini. The other two things would be a fueled, fully-equipped helicopter and a pilot...

Favorite word: Apostrophe. One of my teachers once gave this word a new meaning. Now I'm not sure what it means...

If you could be an animal, what animal would you be and why: Could be? I am the Falcon...

Favorite sporting moment of all time: Even though I was far from a figment of any body's mind, the 1980 Miracle on Ice is the best moment in the history of American sports. It was more than just a hockey game and more than just the Olympics. This game had meaning that transcended sport...

What do you bring to the table? I may not be the best writer or the most intelligent person, but I can sure talk/write for a long facking time. Don't tempt me...

What do you take off the table? I don't quite understand the question...

If you could have lunch with any three people in the world, who would it be and why? Carmella DeCesare (hot), Junior Griffey (hero), and Wayne Gretzky (amazing)...

Describe yourself in one word: Blunt...

Favorite sport and why? Baseball. There is nothing else in the world like this sport. There is so much that goes on during the course of a single game, you are always learning something new, it has stood the trials of time, and most of all it relates to all aspects of life...

Let me make one thing clear, Blunt can also mean "straight-shooter." Take it as you will...

Q&A: Justin, Resident Phanatic

Name: Justin

Nickname: JuTMSY4 or Justin...a lot of people ask me where i got "JuTMSY4." All I remember doing is making it up as an AIM screen name over 10 years ago...since then, it's lost all meaning. I really have no idea. Since then, I've managed to use it over and over again...mostly because I remember it

Favorite Sports Team: I bleed green. Its the Philadelphia Eagles. But I'm a Philadelphia fan through and through

Favorite Player of All Time: He may be displaced in 10 years, but right now its Brian Dawkins. The guy's a consummate team player, a leader on the field and a tough motherfucker.

Favorite Food: Either Spaghetti and sauce (Cheap noodles and some Ragu is fine by me) or German Potato Salad...extra vinegar please

Favorite Drink: Yuengling Lager

If you could take three things with you on a deserted island, what would they be:

Angela:
I would take The DaVinci Code... so I could burn The DaVinci Code.
Dwight: Okay. Great, that's going to keep you warm for like 7 seconds. Question: is there fire wood on the island?
Jim: I guess.
Dwight: Then I would bring an axe, no books.
Jim: Uh, it has to be a book, Dwight.
Dwight: Fine. Physician's Desk Reference.
Jim: Nice. Smart.
Dwight: ...hollowed out, inside: waterproof matches, iodine tablets, beet seeds, protein bars, NASA blanket, and, in case I get bored, Harry Potter and Sorcerer's Stone. No, Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban. Question: did my shoes come off in the plane crash?
Oh, you meant seriously? I'd take a Volleyball. Because you can use it for anything...Soccer, basketball, bouncing up in the air...And I don't even like Volleyball...but its the most versatile of the balls.
I'd actually take a bible...its the most famous piece of literature in the world and is incredibly long. If there's something I'd be doomed (did I say that?) to read for the rest of my life, I guess I'd have to go with that...maybe I could be all philosophical...
The third is my Reggie White jersey. Because I wouldn't want to be rescued by a Cowboys fan.

Favorite Word: "Antidisestablishmentarianism" Its the longest word in the dictionary

If you could be an animal, what animal would you be and why: Human's an animal right?

Favorite Sporting Moment of All Time: I don't really know how I could pick one. Living in Boston at the time, I'll could say the Combo :Aaron Boone to the Red Sox Comeback a year later (it was really fun and I didn't hate the Red Sox then) or Philly staples iIenjoyed (or have gotten over) like Joe Carter's game 6 blast, the Eagles getting taped by the Patriots in SB 39 or the Flyers '97 drubbing by the Red Wings.
In the end, I'll go with three other options and a final choice. 2000: Eagles Vs. Cowboys and in the infamous Pickle Juice Game. On the opening kickoff the Eagles faked a regular kick and went on sides, recovering and proceeding to blow out the Cowboys. 2002: Brian Westbrook's miracle return against the Giants. But the winner is 4th and 26. If you need to look it up, then you probably don't miss Freddy Mitchell and his hands as much as I do.

What do you bring to the table: Honestly, I'm a Philly fan stuck in Boston, which is something like the 8th circle...the only advantage being its a pretty nice city. I'm also opinionated as hell and I will defend my favorite teams to the grave. Any Eagles fan can rip the Eagles, but another fan, you can forget it. Otherwise, I'm an eclectic style. One day I'll write a serious piece questioning a style of blocking by an NFL coach (which I've done...Shanahan you dick!) and another day I'll sit down and as an American Gladiator some questions, like why he howls (also done...His name was Wolf).
Oh and if you say I can't do it...I'll do it

What do you take off the table: Motivation. When the Muse inspires me, I can catch fire, but if I get bogged down, it could take a while to get out of a funk.

If you could have lunch with any three people in the world, who would they be and why:

For Sports: That'd be Buddy Ryan. The guy's on of the strangest heroes in Philadelphia. Never won a playoff game for the Eagles but is revered and arguably more respected than current Head Coach Andy Reid (who is the most successful Eagles coach). To pick Buddy's brain would be a treat.
For the World: There's three choices for me. 1) Hu Jintao, the current leader of China, 2) Vladimir Putnin, the leader of Russia. But in reality there's one guy who I feel would be the ideal lunch partner.
Henry Kissinger is so savvy, so well connected and so wise on practically all matters, that to sit down with him and grasp just one aspect of his presence, authority and understanding would take a series of lunch dates lasting well beyond a decade. Without a doubt, we'll disagree on issues, but amongst his experience would be so much to learn.
For me: This one's a no-brainer and it doesn't happen as often as it should any more. But the person I respect the most in this world is my father and to enjoy another sandwich across from the old man is always an awesome treat (and generally he buys!). But I love and respect my dad more than anything and our conversations are always a treat.

Describe Yourself in one word: Relentless

Favorite Sport and Why: Its a tough spot to pick between Football and Baseball. Baseball was my first love, but football has always echoed as the ideal struggle and provides the opportunity to always have a shot (you're never out in football). It's the buzz of September in Philly that seals the deal. Just the excitement and momentum no matter how bad the team is. When its football season, all is right.
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