On The Brink: AFC South Preview

With all of us thankfully on the brink of the pre-season, I've decided it's time to finally bang out my division previews. I wanted to do them back in late April but felt it was a tad too early. But with the pre-season now a little over a week away -- well, I don't think I need to explain the title anymore. As always, enjoy and feel free to agree with my genius in the comments. Or make fun of me... whichever you'd prefer.

An argument could be made that the AFC South is the best division in football. Granted, such an argument would get completely destroyed by anyone who was aware of the NFC East’s existence, but it’s in the conversation none-the-less. It can be said, though, that it is the best division in the AFC. So there’s that.

The Colts have had the division on lock for what seems like the last century, but it’s becoming clear that the other teams in the division have realistic expectations of one day obtaining the divisional crown. For the first time in a long time, the Colts have a realistic shot of not winning the AFC South. The team with the best shot of toppling the Colts is the Jacksonville Jaguars, who have consistently moved closer and closer towards being on the same level as Indianapolis and have now found a capable QB who makes limited mistakes and makes plays when the team needs him to. He’s no Peyton Manning, sure -- well at least not yet.

The Texans showed promise at the start of last year but couldn’t close it out due to injuries to key players on offense and a young (albeit blossoming) defensive unit. Should Matt Schaub and Andre Johnson stay healthy this year, they have enough firepower to go blow for blow with the Colts if they can stay on their A game.

Then there’s the Titans who everyone seems to write off but are consistently in it when all‘s said and done these past couple years. The offense is absolutely loaded with young talent at each skill position and the unit has the potentially to really evolve this year. Would it have killed the organization to get a legit wide receiver for Vince Young to throw to that isn’t young and still unproven? Muhsin Muhammad? Bernard Berrian? Donte Stallworth? Maybe it’s all overreaction; the Titans front office does do this for a living after all. But then again, that does not guarantee eventual success (see: The New York Knicks).

Although either Houston or Tennessee could surprise everyone and become one of the few teams that has a Cinderella season, the likely battle for the division title will come down to Indianapolis and Jacksonville. Although the Jaguars lost defensive lineman Marcus Stroud to free agency, they focused on the defensive line early on in the draft and should be just fine in that department. Also, don’t be surprised if Quentin Groves turns out to be the best defensive rookie selection by any team in the divisi-- nay, the league.

With Fred Taylor showing no signs of slowing down, his play will eventually start declining as he continues to get up there in age. Luckily for the Jaguars, Maurice Jones-Drew is poised to accept the starting role and could become one of the best running backs in the league should he see even more playing time. Should Garrard be able to prove that last year was not a fluke and continue to play like a top tier QB, the Jaguars have what it takes to finally topple the mighty Colts this year.

The Jaguars have all of the pieces in place to be challenging the Colts for the AFC South crown for many years to come. Not just that, if they continue to plug their weaknesses through smart free agency signings and strong drafting, they’re set up to be a Super Bowl contender for the next couple years as well.

To reluctantly sample a Mercury Morris’ quote, Indianapolis, meet Jacksonville. They got in your neighborhood two years ago, pulled up to your house last year and are now threatening to beat down the door.

Nine days left boys and girls. Stay tuned for the rest of the league.

Division projection:

Jacksonville Jaguars (12-4)
Indianapolis Colts (11-5)
Houston Texans (8-8)
Tennessee Titans (8-8)

Hand Off to the "Linkin' Logs" (7/25/08)

Some interesting news out of California today. Piedmont, CA head football coach Kurt Bryan and their director of Football Operations Steve (don't call me Stan) Humphries have come up with perhaps the most stunning football development not seen since the creation of the Shotgun.

Well, last season Piedmont High's football minds developed a method in which to make all players on the field eligible receivers. The system is based on the idea of having two quarterbacks, and a base offense that consisted of a center, two tight ends book ending him, six receivers (split three on each side) and two Quarterbacks, one playing deep in the backfield (seven plus yards). This offense was nicknamed the "Pluto offense" but later became the "A-11 Offense" as in all 11 players can become receivers. The offense even has an official website: www.a11offense.com, which describes itself as "an innovative offense blending aspects of the spread option, West Coast and run and shoot."

And while reviewing the rules and working with league officials, Bryan and Humphries became sure the offense could be legal. While only five receivers are actually eligible, the other seven players move and can make different plays in the backfield, nevermind the two QBs who can easily lateral to eachother creating even more options. So twenty years from now, when you see the A-11 in the pros, harkin back to Bryan and Humphries, the innovators.

• I thought Kerry Wood was on the DL last week... What makes it more entertaining is that is retroactive to July 14th, even though he was placed on the DL on the 24th, which means Wood is eligible to return on the 29th, or next Tuesday...
• Apparently MLB is conducting a study of broken bats from last season and the current one. One average one bat is broken per game. Good ole Cholly Manuel has the best solution; "better bats." But really, he's more interested in quality handles, which have gotten much thinner over the years...there's a good place to start.
• We can only hope the Cubbies get into a brawl after calling up this prospect.
• 76ers add the nut-puncher
• Jason Cole of Yahoo is apparently leading rumblings that the Favre talks are reaching a head. The Packers will come up with a list of teams and Favre will allow them to move forward. Two words: Tampa & Bay
• Great Player and Good Guy, Good Bye Rod Smith
• Who the fuck is Adam Jones? And why does that asshole need to be reinstated? Oh? What? Make it Rain!
• Penn State held a one man practice last night, that ended with one student attempting to take home the Alamo Bowl Trophy
• And of course, thanks to AA, Sweet Jesus! Awesome Baseball Brawl!

BNB Exclusive: Justin Sits Down with Venom from American Gladiators

On January 6, 2008, American Gladiators redebuted on NBC. Due to the writers strike, AG became a relative hit and easily complemented NBC’s lineup with such shows as “Deal or No Deal.” "Hosted by Hulk Hogan and Laila Ali, the show matches amateur athletes against each other and the show's own "gladiators" in contests of strength, agility, and endurance. It is a revival of the original American Gladiators which ran from 1989-1996, with elements of the UK version of the 1990s. An average of 12 million people watched the two-hour premier" (Wikipedia).

On May 12, 2008, AG was back and better than ever, debuting 8 new Gladiators over the course of the season but retaining many fan favorites. Among the returning gladiators was the ferocious "Venom" also known as Beth Horn, an a passionate woman who never saw a dream too big to chase or a goal to far to ignore. Justin Yost recently spent time e-mailing Beth:

Your first steps as a gladiator were made in September of 2007, just a week after a fitness competition? Why'd you decide to make the move from competitions such as fitness and figure to something more in line with direct competition, such as Gladiators?

I had not competed in fitness in over four years. I decided to do another show just for fun & it was actually my first figure competition. A week later my coach told me about the auditions. I was hesitant at first because I was out of town, but my coach said you have to come back home for this. Once I was committed, I was extremely psyched about the show. I thought, “This could be big”! I told them from day one, “I want to be a Gladiator”. That was my goal and that was my intention for the next four months!

Anyone who's done anything remotely athletic or follows most major sports knows that a torn ACL is one of the more devastating injuries. You've down it twice and yet we watch you on American Gladiators every week. What's your secret?

You have got to keep your body strong, especially the quads & hamstrings. My workouts are extremely athletic, which is key. It is all about performing athletically. My workouts are full of sprinting, jumping, plyos, etc. I do not do any cardio and very little weights. My trainer, Bob Dixon is a genius at what he does. He constantly changes everything up and keeps it challenging & fun.

Sure, I get it, you snare them in with charm and good looks and then strike them with your bite. But seriously, "Venom", where'd that come from?'

Venom was a collaboration of all the Gladiators and NBC coming up with names and characters. I like it. There is no known antidote for Venom! :)~

Both you and Michael O'Hearn (Titan) are known for a more holistic way of training. Have you ever compared notes?

I have never compared notes with Mike, so I don’t know what his holistic approach is. I feel the mind & body are so connected. I work on myself on every level- physically, mentally, emotionally & spiritually. When you workout, eat healthy, sleep enough, you feel incredible inside and out. Everyone wants to look good, but feeling great is the best. Health is everything. When you have your health you should be happy and grateful. I believe we are spiritual beings having a physical experience, so enjoy what life has to offer!

You've faced some adversity and some disappointment (so many third place finishes!) and yet you have such a positive attitude. Is that the key to your success and what advice would you give to someone to help them remain positive?

In fitness, the top two places turned professional. I placed third, three times in a row at all the Nationals. I was so frustrated! Twelve weeks out before my last chance to qualify that year, I was walking at the beach, stepped down & broke my foot in two places! From that point on, I told myself never again will I let negative thoughts, negative energy and people get to me like that again. I got back to my positive attitude and wrote down on my note card, “I am the Overall National Fitness Champion”. I indeed became champion on November 11, 2000.

My positive attitude has been crucial to my career and my life. Our thoughts are energy. When you are thinking positively, you are creating positive feelings. These thoughts & feelings are creating what you are bringing into your life! Replace a negative thought with a positive one. Enjoy & feel those positive feelings & follow up with your positive actions.

I know this seems a bit unfair but, numerous rogue bloggers have claimed that American Gladiators is nothing more than low budget professional wrestling and is completely staged. Have any thoughts on that matter?

WHAT!? Are you kidding me!? American Gladiators is completely real & it is 100% pure competition!!! We go all out on every competitor. I give 100% every time I am in the Gladiator arena. This is my Olympics! I am going to give that contender everything I have, so look out!!

What do you think of the former contestants-turned-gladiators from last season? Any animosity amongst the gladiators of the old class versus the new class? (Sharks and Jets maybe?)

I think Jet & Rocket did a terrific job this season as Gladiators. I thought they looked great on camera & performed well. They fit right in with all of us. We have an amazing bunch of Gladiators. I love all of them! I think Jet & Rocket found it much harder than they thought it would be, being on our side as Gladiators this time around!

From my sit down with "Wolf" we learned that events were essentially given on a first come first serve basis. You've ended up doing quite a few events, but which one is your favorite and why?

I would say we do the events we are strongest in. I am happy that I am able to do any of the events, but my favorites are the Wall & Hang Tough. These two events are by far the most challenging! On the rings you never know what is going to happen & there really is no ‘game plan’. The Wall is just a difficult course and it is 50 feet high. I like a great challenge. However, the new event, Sideswipe is the ultimate blast, just not quite as challenging.

We can't all be gladiators forever, eventually, when you finish, what's next?

Well, I will always be a Gladiator! I am Venom forever. J I just finished my first movie (Wolf is in it too!) It is called Fancypants & it will be out in 2009. We both played pro-wrestlers and even had a fight scene together. This was choreographed, unlike Gladiators & it was an awesome experience. I plan on doing more T.V. and movies. I will have my own show one day. I would like to play a Super Hero and a James Bond girl in movies. I am working on several projects, including training/workout dvds. I will continue to promote health and fitness through out my life as well as inspire people to follow their dreams and believe in themselves.

As Venom, you're pretty fearsome, but which other gladiator do you fear the most (Personally, If I run into Justice in the street, I'm passing…and you can tell Wolf I said that)?'

I have to say I love all the Gladiators! I know them so well and I know they are really great people with warm hearts, so I really fear none of them! However watching it on T.V. as a spectator, Wolf, Toa & Militia are kinda scary!

And for some fun ones…
favorite pizza topping?
thin crust; pepperoni!
Mini-van or SUV?
Mini-van? no way! SUV- if it’s a hybrid.
Ice Cream Flavor (no chocolate, vanilla or strawberry…I'm talking real flavors here!)?
Believe it or not I do not like ice cream! I like frozen yogurt. Vanilla!
Favorite sports team?
Chicago Bears, Bulls, Cubs & Sox! (Yes, I am from Chicago!)
Coke or Pepsi?
if I have to pick, Coke
Favorite TV Show?
do you have to ask? “AMERICAN GLADIATORS!” & Top Model
When you were a kid, where did you see yourself at your current age?
No, I never saw myself at this age as a kid!
Okay, last one. You strike me as someone who's got a few moves of her own. Ever teach your Husband a thing or two about being a Gladiator?

Ha! He would tell you “I taught her everything she knows!” He did teach me how to tackle for Powerball!

Any last words Beth?
Be grateful for everything. Have fun in life & enjoy each and everyday. Dream big & go for it. You can do anything you put your mind to!

I'd like to thank Beth Horn for taking the time to talk with me. She was a pleasure and a treat. You can visit Beth's website at http://www.bethhorn.com/

Think you've got what it takes to beat a gladiator? Find out by auditioning here.

''You can see Venom and all the Gladiators on the return of “American Gladiators,” next Monday, July 28 at 8:00PM on NBC.''

Training Camp is in the Air - "Linkin' Logs" (7/24/08)

Of course it would happen that way. The Phillies and the Mets square off today, at high noon (okay, 10 after) to decide who gets to lead the division for another day and really, who has momentum going into the next 60 games. The teams will meet 5 more times, namely in late August and (again) in early September and that will probably be it, baring a meeting in the NLCS. Needless to say, it should be an entertaining 2 and 1/2 months.

But really, the stories of from here on out will mostly involve football, as most teams are beginning to or already have opened training camp, signaling the beginning of the pure entertainment otherwise known as Football.

We'll do our best to keep you aprized of any entertaining developments but for now...Links!

• I wonder if 50 year old WNBA players can fight as well? At least she won't get pregnant...right?
• Our condolences to Pedro Martinez, who's father, Pablo, passed away last night at the age of 79 after a long battle with brain cancer. Martinez left last night's game in the 7th to take a charter flight to the Domincan Republic. We can only hope that Mr. Martinez's death is met with some measure of relief, as he has been suffering for months. For now, most baseball fans understand that Pedro needs to focus on what's really important and we at BNB wish him and his family the best.
• If you thought the Atlanta Braves were already looking to be in trouble, now they're completely effed!
• And then there were Five (bidders for the cubbies)
• Come on Red Sox; Manny Ramirez "mysteriously" has a sore right knee, its almost August and the team is battling for a playoff spot...he obviously just wants to take a little vacation time.
• Only in America would anyone pay Steve Bartman to show up...anywhere
• And now he's texting too? What is this, high school?
• There's a showdown brewing in Chicago between Devin Hester and the Bears...betcha Hester wins...
• Hey look, Donte Stallworth is hurt...personally, I'm shocked...
• One thing this BNB "writer" takes pride in is pointing out the stupidity of Keith Hernandez. Exhibit A, Keith storing this little kitty in his spank bank
• While we're at it, The Fightin's also gave us this little ditty about Chris Wheeler layin' it down on Jose Reyes's antics. Can't say I don't disagree...I'd love to smack the smile right off that guy's face...really...
• They're letting Merrill Hodge out of his cage? Shit....
• And Deadspin has some nice info on the Army porking Detroit Lions TE Caleb Campbell right before he could get into camp. Alright Army, this is not exactly the way to get good PR...

Update: Screw it, i might be willing to Jose Canseco this whole thing just to take a swing at Reyes. Am I going to be a sore loser? Sure, why the hell not. Jose Reyes isthe definition of a classless player; Pissed at the ump for not getting your way? Check Fist pumps at every home run? Check Stomp around the field after being called out on a stolen base? Check Think your wise-ass smile will give you popularity around the league? Check.

Maybe its just the typical fight for first (and losing) thing that makes my blood boil, but does anyone else think this Mets team is just slightly more pansy-assed than anyone else. Barry Sanders always put it best; "Act like you've been there before."

Bottom Line: I'd still slap the smile off his face. Who's with me?!

Johan Gets Fucked...Again!

The Philadelphia Phillies traveled to New York to open up a three-game series with the Mets, yesterday. Both teams, as many of you may know, shared the National League East lead (both teams went into the contest at 53-46). Mets' ace Johan Santana, who hadn't earned a win in several starts, was on the mound facing off with Philly's newly acquired Joe Blanton, who was making his first start with the squad.

As expected, Santana got off to a quick start, and ended up going 8 strong innings, with two earned runs, and 4 K's. An RBI double off David Wright's bat, accompanied by a two-run shot hit by Carlos Delgado--his 19th of the season--gave New York a 3-1 lead through three innings at Shea. Ramon Castro extended the Mets' lead to 5-1 with another two-run homer in the bottom of the sixth inning, scoring Marlon Anderson.

The Phillies' Shane Victorino added one more run in the seventh for Philadelphia, but going into the the ninth inning Philadelphia was down three runs, after New York failed to add a few insurance runs in the 8th inning.

Twenty-five year old second baseman, Argenis Reyes, pinch hit for Santana in the bottom of the eighth inning, since Santana had already thrown 105 pitches. So, Jerry Manuel, needing to make a quick call to the bullpen in the top of the ninth, called on Duaner Sanchez. Sanchez gave up three earned runs on just three hits , and failed to record a single out. Joe Smith, who was eventually given the loss, gave up the go-ahead run. Finally Pedro Feliciano, and Aaron Heilman came in and got the three outs, but Pedro gave up two more runs, and walked a guy while he was at it.

Phillie closer Brad Lidge closed out the bottom of the ninth inning to clinch the comeback-win in New York, of course. The save was awarded to Lidge, which was his 22nd of the season. As you can see, the Mets have really missed Billy Wagner, who will only miss a few games. And..Johan would've REALLY helped my slumping fantasy team had his bullpen been able to close out the game. Damn you New York!!

Drop a Deuce...or a "Linkin' Log" (7/23/08)

I'm still pretty pumped up about the 6 run flurry the Phils suprised everyone with last night. That being said, its always a hollow victory if you can't back it up with more Ws to take a division lead.

All gloating aside, beating Santana in the 9th (aka taking advantage of the bullpen) certainly adds fuel to the fire of this "rivalry" (because its not really all that much of a rivalry). Insufferably Mets fans will have you think that this Philadelphia franchise has always been a fraud, but when a team finally (Finally!) tries to do right by its fanbase (or as close as you're ever gonna get), it's ashame that another team's fanbase (alright, schmuck 1 in 10 fans) needs to find some reason to prove their better, even if the standings aren't it. But for the rest of the sufferable ones (the other 9 of 1o) its really just hoping a few things roll the right way, because otherwise you have no control...

that and come September it won't matter, its Eagles season for me!

Links!

• Jon Rauch is a D-Bag (heh), Randy Wolf is an Astro, while Mike Hampton returns from another DL stint and Brett Myers returns from a bout of suckatude
• Chicago's baseball is apparently sketchy as hell
• Wait...trades are coming? Hank and Hal Steinbrenner are involved...Yessssss!
• Packers talking to Bucaneers...ok, not exactly, but you can't tell me they're not thinking "but the Bucs'll pay soooo much!"
• Poor Brian Urlacher...56 mil just wasn't enough (plus the Vitamin Water!)
• So apparently The Sport News released an online sports "newspaper." Am I the only who's thinking "what the shit? This has existed for years". And besides, just because others aren't in "newspaper" form doesn't mean they're not the same...its just pointless and kind of a waste of time (on both the editors and readers).
• Chicks Fighting! (Caution: not that cool)
• And thanks to Deadspin...Cool!

Quick Pick "Linkin' Logs" (7/22/08)

Busy day for this BadNewsBlogger, but I'd be remiss to not provide at least a few links. But rather than mostly news-esque items (read: legitimate information) I'll just give you some good ole blog items.

I'll also quickly gloat about the Phils stunning 6 run 9th to take control of the NL East. Beating Santana is nice (Even if Blanton was...eh?), but its a 3 game set and the mood can change just as fast as 1 (long) inning.

Links!

• The700level.com backs up my shit
• also via the700level, a nice look at the soft side of Sir Charles
• "1girl1cake" - Yes, it exists...and yeah, its pretty weird
• Alright, I've got a good reason to watch the LPGA...
• Ok, this one's kinda cool. Apparently, there's a pretty obvious reason the Packers knew Brett Favre was talking to the Vikings...it might have something to do with the (*Packers Issued*) cell phone Favre was using to talk to Brad Childress....I mean, merely hypothetical they were chatting about football...
• When you're engraving Super Bowl rings you should never use the phrase "Close enough"
• Formerly of Deadspin, Will Leitch previews the Phils-Mets series. But let's play a game...read Leitch's last paragraph and find the mistake (at least I'm fairly confident its a mistake)...its not a typo or some grammar bullshit...its a straight-up brain-fart mistake...fire that editor
• I love donating to charity (even if it is just my old clothes...), but this kinda takes the cake as far as stupid things to care about...and yeah, i love dogs...
  

The Top 10 Fantasy Football Do Not's

Normally I would try and write a riveting introduction to this article -- but I think the title pretty much explains it as much as it needs to be. So, take notes, learn some things and as always -- at least try and enjoy.

This picture has nothing to do with this article, but I thought everyone would probably enjoy it.

10. Taking your team name too seriously

The Beantown Brawlers? Seriously? First off, you’ve never been a brawl. And second off, you don’t even live in Boston. You live in Abington. So either pick a better name, or try and name your team something that doesn’t blatantly reveal that you think your tough and/or take yourself entirely too seriously. On the extreme end of this, don’t name your team something stupid -- like The Windy City Farters. There is lots of opportunity to act like your twelve years old in fantasy football, but naming your team isn’t one of them.

9. Letting your girlfriend/wife in on the action

While I’m all for girlfriend/wife participation to some extent in fantasy sports, you better not be letting it happen if your league is for money. If it is, than you sir, are a dumb ass. If utilized wisely, this “mistake” can actually turn your usual bickering Sundays into easy-riding football marathons. “But honey, we need to watch the Sunday Night Football game because we have Kevin Kolb on our bench and we need to see how he reacts being on an actual bench during a primetime game. It’s one of the keys to our season!”

8. Thinking your “sleepers” will actually turn out to be sleepers

I don’t care how much you know about football, the whole sleeper business is a crock of shit. Most of the sleepers people pick aren’t even sleepers at all, unless you define a sleeper as someone who everyone knew about and wasn‘t all surprised when they began to have a good season. I’m sorry, but Frank Gore is not a sleeper. Idiot.

7. Not having a draft plan

If you just go into a draft with nothing but your “knowledge” to guide you, than I don’t know what to tell you. You need to know your leagues scoring, you need to know how many of each position you need to start and you need to know the inner-workings of those who are drafting with you. This is why I’m a staunch supporter of friend leagues where you can smack-talk face to face, as opposed to the free Yahoo! Leagues in which no one knows each other, but everyone seems to know each others mother. The more you know about your opponents, the better you can add to your draft plan -- and if you don’t have a draft plan at all, then why the hell are you playing fantasy football?

6. Buying too many fantasy football magazines

I can actually attest to committing this mistake. However, one day it hit me. Most of the magazines that are available for fantasy football, or fantasy anything for that matter, have pretty much the same information -- just in a different layout and with slightly different words. It’s sort of like in high school when you tried to turn that one sentence fact into a four paragraph essay. At least, that’s what I did in high school.

5. Buying into hype

Most of the time, hype doesn’t really produce actual results. It just produces enough hype for you to buy into it and eventually lose games, money and points. And as we all know, those three go hand in hand. See: Reggie Bush, Matt Leinart. Hey, they both went to USC. Weird.

4. Buying into upside

Upside is all well and great, but if can often get you into trouble. Most of us aren’t narcissists so we always try and look at the upside of a player but sometimes too much so. Like that time when I called everyone to write down that I was predicting Mewelde Moore as the next great running back. That didn’t turn out so well, as I’m sure you know. It still haunts me to this day.

3. Taking the smack talk just a tad too far

Yes, if your among friends you can push the limits and call a remembrance of the time your friend hooked up with that fat girl that looked like a guy. However, calling a remembrance of the time your recently defeated opponent cried because his cat died -- okay, that’s still okay. Pretty much everything is fair game in regards to smack talk. Just don’t joke about any terminally fatal diseases or anything you asshole.

2. Showing up drunk to the draft

Want to draft three kickers, make four trades and profess your love for your friends brother sister? Then drink up, champ. Nothing kicks off a fantasy football season than showing that your only weakness is a thing called booze -- then having everyone subsequently try and get you drunk and make lopsided trades. It’s fun while your getting free drinks and all, but when you wake up the next morning and discover that you’ve traded Larry Fitzgerald for Mark Clayton and Devery Henderson -- well, that’s not as much fun.

1. As a matter of fact, doing anything drunk in regards to fantasy football

Trades, drafting, smack-talk -- if I had to write a fantasy football guide in regards to ‘Do Not Do These Things’ than alcohol would be prominently involved in each one. Take every reason on this list, add some alcohol and you’ve got yourself a potent mixture that will almost always end badly. If your in a money league, than just don’t get drunk. Just don’t do it. Your either going to drunk dial your ex or trade Stephen Jackson for a bag of jelly beans. Neither will end well.