A Piping Hot Stove Pile of 10 Things I Think Smell Like Shit (12/10/08)

With Baseball's Hot Stove at full burn and the NCAA Football Bowl Games slate coming to a full boil, we have lots to bitch about and there's at least 10 things that smell like shit...

1. C.C. You in New York. If you haven't heard already; it appears as though C.C. Sabathia will sign the richest contract for a pitcher in baseball history. This will blow away the previous record(s)...all set by the Yankees anyway. Its looking like 7 years and $160 million or almost $23 million per year. Plus Sabathia is rumored to have an opt out clause after three years (and $69 million) so that he can either seek a new team or reup for maybe even more. With this economy (even though the Yankees seem uneffected), I can't imagine him getting a better deal elsewhere until his career is over.
   
2. Mets add K-Rod. On the face of it, this looks like a solid move. And moreover, the 3 years $37 million deal is certainly appetizing for a rich team capable of tossing off a few dead years if they really need to. So what's the hitch? Well, the Angels are rumored to be saving cash for Teixeira or Ramiriz, but I believe the real reason they passed is because after they used up K-Rod for the stretch run, they knew he wasn't going to be worth the cash. Why go from 5 years $75 million to 3 and $37 million? So while this solidifies the Mets pen beyond the likes of Sanchez or Wagner, it still leaves questions; especially when they'll be contending with the defending World (Fucking) Champions next year.
3. Porter Defends Burress. Now let's get one thing straight: I'm fine with the 2nd amendment, though I don't own a gun (and wouldn't really buy one save maybe a rifle to go hunting with if I ever became interested). Now Joey Porter went on TV (specifically ESPN's First Take) to defend Plexiglass and his gun. First of all, Plaxico broke the law. There may be an argument that said NYC law violates the 2nd amendment, but the fact of the matter is, the people of NYC (via their legislators) wanted it and its now illegal. So yes, Plaxico broke the law and I believe he should be punished to the extent that anyone with a similar record would. Secondly. Joey Porter? What the shit? If someone's going to rob you, are you just gonna bust out your 9mm and point it back? You're right Joey, I don't know because A) I don't have that kind of cash B) I certainly don't flaunt it (or act like I do) and C) I attempt to avoid those situations in general. Legal or not, I just don't see the value in a firearm, especially when you're going to a club and you've got a few buds surrounding you. A couple of dudes aren't gonna come and stick you up and its not like you're gonna be walking down that dark alley by yourself any time soon. What the hell are you talking about Joey?
4. The C.C. Salary Simulator. I'm not quite sure there's anything more depressing than this. ESPN created a simple calculator program that, using average salaries and statistics will compare your current salary to his. Depressing to say the least. And in this economy, I can't imagine anyone being to thrilled by the results.
5. Saying Goodbye to the Wizard. I'm a Phillies fan, but even I marveled at the Wizard, Greg Maddux's success through the years. He quietly dominated a hitting (and steroided) era, and became the winningest pitcher of said era. Baseball (and its fans) will miss him. Oh, and don't forget; Chicks Dig the Long Ball.
6. Teixeira Sees Sabathia...is he going for a raise? There are quite a few teams that have interest in the second best first baseman in the league (Albert Pujols being numero uno) and the price tag seems fairly close to Sabathia's. And with so many teams rumored to be interested in his services (Nationals, Orioles, Red Sox, Yankees and Angels off the top of my head), its hard to imagine a scenario where there isn't some type of bidding war. The Nats have already offered 8 years and $160 million, which is ideal for Tex because of both the cash and location (his family is in Maryland), but a chance to play for contenders like the Angels or Red Sox cannot be denied. Plus, speaking from experience, a flight from Boston to Baltimore is cheap and easy...not that price will ever be an issue.
   
7. Jerry Jones Pries His Foot Out of His Mouth. If you didn't hear what Jerry Jones said about Marion Barber prior the Dallas-Pittsburgh game, you missed a lot. Essentially, Jones questioned Barber's toughness and dedication to be on the field regardless of the toe injury. Jone "backpedaled" yesterday by saying:

   “We all know how tough Marion Barber is, but when he had his injury I felt, look, you'd have to shoot him to keep him off the football field,” Jones said. “So I was surprised that we didn't have him. That's not meant to be critical of his toughness. It did come out that way, but fundamentally it was because he is so tough that you would have thought that he could play.”

   "old strategy cotton, let's see if it pays off."
   
8. Miller gets got. An interesting story out of Buffalo Sabres camp, especially in the wake of Sean Avery's 6 game suspension for a "sloppy seconds" remark. Apparently during a highly contested Sabres game, Ryan Miller, Sabres goaltender, expressed his concerns over the officiating for the game. Apparently, Miller was "asking a questions" regarding the officiating and claims the official told him "to go[fuck] himself."

   “To be honest, I was respectful. I asked him a question and he told me maybe I should ‘go [bleep] myself.’ ” - Ryan Miller, Sabres Goalie

   Frankly, this is a stunning development, though I am slightly surprised we don't hear about this a bit more often. Its not unusual for the occasional "off the handle" comment, but it certainly is unprofessional. Highlights from tape of the game show a discussion between Miller and the referee and certainly some type of distaste, but its hard to tell what's going on. I'll be anxious to see the response from both the league and official, as the Sabres PR department has no comment.
9. Portis Vs. Zorn...ding! If you haven't seen this one yet, let me just say, it certainly is a sign of the end of the NFL season for the Washington Redskins. After being handled by the Ravens last Sunday and infighting beginning after said game, its just a sign that this team is now lost after going 6-2 in the first half of the season and 1-4 since. Portis was upset over his lack of attention in the 2nd half of the Ravens game (already down 14 points) and his one single carry in the 2nd half on. In 10 previous carries, Portis had 29 yards total. Hard to see why they'd keep going to him when they needed points. And while Portis complained about a lack of playing time, with his injuries and Ladell Betts practice time (to block) its not hard to understand why Zorn kept Betts in.
   
10. And this one stinks for a different reason. Matt Cassel lost his father yesterday. Fortunately, the Patriots were on the West Coast all week, so Cassel simply left Northern California for his home in L.A. I personally can't imagine being age 26 and losing my father, so I think I speak for everyone here are BNB when I say we all send our condolences to the Cassel Family